Author: Kate Leaver
Publication date: 7th March 2019
My rating: ★★★☆☆
Goodreads rating: 3.89
Genre: Contemporary, Non Fiction
Our best friends, Twitter followers, gal-pals, bromances, Facebook friends, and long distance buddies define us in ways we rarely openly acknowledge. But as a society, we are simultaneously terrified of being alone and already desperately lonely. We move through life in packs and friendship circles and yet, in the most interconnected age, we are stuck in the greatest loneliness epidemic of our time. It’s killing us, making us miserable and causing a public health crisis. Increasingly, we don’t just die alone; we die because we are alone. What if meaningful friendships are the solution?
Journalist Kate Leaver believes that friendship is the essential cure for the modern malaise of solitude, ill health, and anxiety and that, if we only treated camaraderie as a social priority, it could affect everything from our physical health and emotional well being. Her much-anticipated manifesto, The Friendship Cure, looks at what friendship means, how it can survive, why we need it, and what we can do to get the most from it.
Why do some friendships last a lifetime, while others are only temporary? How do you “break up” with a toxic friend? How do you make friends as an adult? Can men and women really be platonic? What are the curative qualities of friendship, and how we can deploy friendship to actually live longer, better lives?
From behavioral scientists to besties, Kate draws upon the extraordinary research from academics, scientists, and psychotherapists, and stories from friends of friends, strangers from the Internet, and her “squad” to get to the bottom of these and other facets of friendship. For readers of Susan Cain’s Quiet and Elizabeth Gilbert’s Big Magic, The Friendship Cure is a fascinating blend of accessible “smart thinking” investigative journalism, pop culture, and memoir for anyone trying to navigate this lonely world, written with the wit, charm, and bite of a fresh voice.
Overall opinion of the book:
The Friendship Cure was an interesting read that made me grateful for all of the friendships I have. The book is brilliantly written and Leaver has clearly put a lot of time and thought into the structure of it. She includes both personal experiences, scientific research and the experiences of others. It was fascinating to read about other people’s experiences (be that positive and negative) with friendship and what they value about it most.
Leaver explores every form of friendship, such as childhood friends, bromances, work friends and relationships. She also discusses toxic friendships and how damaging they can be, emphasising the importance of moving on and “breaking up” with said friends. She emphasises that sometimes you may feel trapped in a friendship and for your own mental health you need to let go, rather than being unhappy.
It was fascinating to read about different people’s interpretations of male and female friendships. Can they ever be platonic, or will one person catch feelings over time? I’m with Kate on this one, I think they totally can be in a platonic friendship, but it’s interesting to see why some people disagree with this. The book discusses statistics and interviewed a number of different people who had different view points and experiences to validate their reasons. The book includes many different pop culture references too, such as Friends and When Harry Met Sally to highlight how friendship is portrayed in the media.
This was such a well written book, that was clear and concise in its research and compelling in its content. The spelling, punctuation and grammar was flawless and I would highly recommend giving it a read. Even if you don’t usually read non fiction, this is such an interesting book and it will certainly remind you not to take your friendships for granted and to value those close to you. As Kate emphasises, “friends are the family you choose” and are so important for our emotional and physical wellbeing.
While Social Media is a fantastic tool where we can meet new friends and connect with the people we love, sometimes it can be overwhelming and unrealistic. For many people it isolates rather than connecting them with others. Given this, it’s important that we take time out to spend time with those we love instead of wondering what our next status should say!
The Friendship Cure celebrates every form of friendship, especially those we share with our fellow female friends. If you want to feel inspired and empowered then this is definitely the book for you! Although it does emphasise the importance of female friendships, men you can read this book too! Leaver discusses bromances in a lot of detail and friendships in relationships.
Shoutout to all of my blogger and non blogger friends – you know who you all are. I’m so grateful for you all and I genuinely don’t know where I’d be without you. 💕
If you would like to purchase a copy of this book, you can do so here:
Have you read The Friendship Cure? What were your thoughts on the book? Let me know in the comments below, I’d love to know! 😊